Keys 🔑 to Success (From Gorick Ng’s “The Unspoken Rules: Secrets to Starting Your Career Off Right”)

No book has so touched me, so connected with me, and spoke so directly to my situation as much as this one.

From reading about Gorick’s mother, who worked so hard but only barely got by because of her lack of relationships, I gained a newfound appreciation of the importance of the ability of communication. I not only saw the perspective of those who were frustrated despite the efforts they put in, but also those wishing they could’ve known these “unspoken rules” much earlier.

This book contains keys that snowball into your later life. The earlier you start practicing and internalizing them, the better and greater rewards you will reap. After all, behavior is a result of standards and habits. Mastering the rules don’t come in one night.

You can check out the book on Gorick’s site by clicking here, or buy the book for yourself here. It was worth every minute of my time and every penny of my hard-earned internship money, and I bet it will be for you too.

These are my top personal takeaways from an excerpt of the book, and there are plenty more to come as I finish reading it:

Key #1: Work is a price of entry for career building.

Key #2: Anything from Harvard Admissions to job searching counts on relationships built, personal brand building & story telling.

Key #3: Reject, embrace, or bend the rules. Do not simply follow.

• What rules can’t be followed, must be followed with 200% of your effort, or be transformed into your own version?
• Make sure that you continue to grow yourself, but also keep the various aspects that define you for who you are.

Key #4: Do the homework — especially when coming into internships:

• The key is to pre-emptively provide value: be very curious & open about asking what people are doing, what you should care about, who are the people you’re working with, what the mission is. Have #highstandards and fit in by taking a proactive approach to align on greater objectives
• When you get stuck on a question, try, then ask.

Key #5: Don’t rely on external stimuli. Create your own

• If you rely on external stimuli, you move at the pace of your surroundings. To truly differentiate yourself from a level, you have to find every opportunity within yourself to provide more value. This means asking for work when you have none, sharing information to provide value, contributing to things based on what others are working on, etc.
• When people ask you “any questions” after briefing you on an assignment, probably the worst thing to do is to say: “no questions”. Learn when you’re in “learner mode” and “leader mode” (when you learn about the task vs when you own the task).

Key #6: Know how to give good updates & tell good stories.

• Think of your life as a hero’s journey. If you were to narrate your life & what you’re doing, what would you say?
• When you give your daily company updates, be sure to pack the what you’ve done with what you still have to do (i.e. next steps). Go into the specifics to what each step you’ve done has accomplished.

Key #7: Make your own decisions

• When others give you orders, think about what the consequences of those are — 2–3 steps down the line.
• Make sure that you make good decisions on your first impressions & your image to others. Rep is important and is most importantly in the small things that you do every day.

Key #8: Think literally and practically

• When you’re analyzing what’s your best course of action to contribute value, particularly when you’re in an internship and you’re relatively free to do what you want, think about the greater goals of the organization and its various milestones. What exactly are they? How can you make their general mission statement into something literal, then own a task related to that?
• The exact OPPOSITE of this would be to do one thing in multiple things at once. Quality engagement > quantity of engagements, and the more you shine in an org, returns go up exponentially.
• This is because the very essence of what you need to do to prove yourself of higher level tasks revolves around actively being hungry in an organization to contribute value.

Key #9: Be Easy To Communicate With:

• List your availability in the other person’s time zone.
• Remove as many obstacles from the other person as possible when asking for help
• Explain CLEARLY your points in 3 points or fewer.
• Provide background information on whatever you talk about
• Have intent behind your interactions (call to action, the way you communicate, etc.)

Key #10: Don’t F**k Up, especially more than 2x.

• Do not mess up on the same thing 2x or more.
• Try your best not to have people remind you of the same thing 2x. The more times people remind you, the less committed and competent you would seem.
• If your manager always asks for X, always be ready with X before they even ask next time.
• Pay attention to the patterns of things your managers ask for. After you do things for the first time, you should have a very clear sense of what is going to come & people will be very impressed if you preemptively prep for this.
• Another way of achieving this can be with people: Actually interact with your coworkers, and read the room. Don’t do things aren’t people aren’t necessarily doing, and respect others’ traditions.

Key #11: Use the Eisenhower matrix

• What’s important to prioritize, what’s not.
• Contributing most of your time to things that are high-priority and high return is guaranteed to move you forward. It’s easy to find work and get busy, but it’s sometimes hard to find the right work.

There are multiple ways to approach how to handle a task. The way you handle it will maximize your efficiency.

Key #12: Read people

• Who has leverage over whom? Who has influence? Stay on people’s good sides.

Key #13: Relationship-build

“Balance your speaking time. Once you’ve interacted with someone, greet them when you encounter them again. Send thank you emails. Ask how things are going. Offer to help. Share relevant news. Broker introductions. Look for and call out commonalities between you and other people”

• What this means: It’s not enough to just say hi once and be done. Develop the relationship for long term value.
• Also, push gently — “Have we considered”, “Pushing back”, “I wonder” are great phrases to start off with.
• Most of this is in the minutia of courtesy, which has to be built over the years as a habit and standard.
• It’s not enough to be competent and excited to work at your job. Relationship building is a must-have for increasing perceived deservingness and exposure to potential for serendipity.

The circle of opportunity doesn’t complete without relationship building.

Key #14: Perceived Confidence

“In the absence of clearly measurable outputs, managers often rely on inputs — like how much progress it looks like you are making on a project, how confidently you speak in meetings, and how well you promote yourself. It’s no surprise, then, that the people who get promoted or who get the highest-profile assignments aren’t always the most competent — even within organizations that claim to be meritocracies. Your actual competence still matters, but, as we’ll discuss later in this guide, your perceived competence can be just as important.”

• Notice this point: The person who gets in does not have to be the most qualified. They can just as well be the person that seems very qualified.
• The better you master all 3Cs (compatibility, competence, commitment) and the more consistently you do them, the better of a chance you’ll have of being and perceived as someone who is high value. The promotion comes as a result of that.

I’m Xiangan — a 17 year old blockchain developer passionate for learning, and I appreciate you for reading! If you enjoyed the article, please feel free to follow me on my LinkedIn, Twitter, or check out my BitClout. Drop me a line & let me know your 🔑 to success!

Thanks for making it to the end!